let it end

Thursday, March 30, 2006

bolly is desperately trying to search for the sunkist advertisement on the internet. bolly thinks the advertisement is very cute. bolly tries to make me take picture of the advertisement whenever we see it on the train. hahahahahaha. BOLLY BOLLY BOLLY. :x

anyway, my dad was looking for random things to scold my brother just now. stood up for him but ended up getting scolded as well. haha. went to meet aunty today. she told me to ignore some people. lalala.

aunty: i'm trying to. but i can't. haha.

wootszxzxzxz. world war 18613584th is going on again. why can't it stop? *sigh*
and now, again, it's my turn to get scolded. TMD LA.

scribbled. ; 10:41 PM

Wednesday, March 29, 2006

MY LATEST TREND.
kidding. lol. it's just an accident.
i forgot to blog about it earlier. so here i am. again.

today, at cross country, i had hema draw a smiley on my arm that goes like this: (:
then, after the event, i washed my arm at j8. GUESS WHAT!

i have a new tan line on my arm. the smiley face. sheesh. if you stare hard enough at my right arm, you'd see it.

hema also drew 'R' at my face. and i'm not planning to look into the mirror. haha.

scribbled. ; 8:48 PM

cross country today. all went well although rasalas came in last. but it's okay. we'll catch up. long distance running just isn't our forte. :) haha.

i'm okay la. i sorta cooled down after venting all my frustrations on some post that not many people read. :p yeah. ignorance is surely bliss. that i can safely conclude. got home not long ago. went to stone with chah while waiting for her hockey to start and for aunty to return my 5842412 calls and sms.

aunty: nvm. tomorrow! haha.

scribbled. ; 4:54 PM

Tuesday, March 28, 2006

you laughed. i cried. yeap.

i've finally lifted off the script protection but it's not like it worked in the first place. so yeah. i've been experiencing major moodswings these days. but i'm still okay.

i did better than what i did for promos. and i didn't really study. so i'm feeling better.
and hey. look, i'm not trying to show off here. but if you don't like what i'm saying, get out this instant. i don't need shitheads prying into my blog and leave feeling offended. at least, i don't need/want to know what crappy comments you're going to leave.

i'm still kinda pissed off from what happened/did not happen.

scribbled. ; 11:43 PM

Wednesday, March 22, 2006

I'M LOST.

i don't know what to do now. don't say i'm too emo. you all don't know what's going through my head at this very moment. and i can't/won't say much here. until i can find the script or find another method to not let people know what i really think.

i'm still living my life as an introvert. once again, i'm back to square one.

(and if i lock this blog, the password might not be given out to people.)

:)

by the way.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY MEI! :)

scribbled. ; 11:34 PM

POST EXAM UPDATE!

although i didn't really study or anything, i'm still glad that block tests are over! haha. and now, about my chem paper today. i think it was quite okay. the standard of the paper was like the one they set for failures.

AND AND AND! this might be my second pass in organic chemistry! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
well, maybe.

so after the exams, pei san, raiza, syimah and me went to swensen's to eat. we took VERYVERYVERYVERYVERYVERY (you get the idea) to decide what to eat. yeah. i think the swensen's girl still looks like the jack's place girl. (JASON!!! but he doesn't come here).

oh yes. i might be locking up this blog soon. as soon as some kind soul teach me how to. lol.
(hint: AUNTY!!!!!!!!!!! THE LOCK. I NEED THE LOCK. you still haven't tell me how!). haha.

IT'S TIME FOR ME TO PLAY. BYEBYE! :D:D:D:D

scribbled. ; 2:30 PM

Tuesday, March 21, 2006

oh my god. i accidentally cleared the post. so, for the second time, updates for today!

econs: essay was pretty okay. i think i'd fare better than i did for previous exams. DRQ AND MCQ were killers. mcq was a random selection of alphabets ranging from A-D while DRQ was random sentence construction. hahahha.

maths: YAY LOR. i love math (mummy. ssshh. lol.). the paper was manageable. (except for the proving part). prove that 4cos-somethingsomething = 3cos x. hahaha. oh well. should be able to pass la. the only reason why i'm so confident is because i haven't really fail any major exam for math. that is, if you exclude A math. i failed A math until the prelims. haha. F9 all the way!

btw, my uncle just sent the john sloman 6th edition over. which means, i now have both the 5th and 6th edition FOC! don't you just love people with PhDs for econs? :x and don't ask me why i'm like this although i "have the econs genes" in me. that's what my uncles and parents said to me. i wonder why too. WHY WHY WHY?????

okay. and now, it's time to hang myself with my chem notes. BYEBYE.

scribbled. ; 9:58 PM

Monday, March 20, 2006

oh dear. it's closing in to 7pm and i haven't started mugging. no inspiration to actually start reading my notes or slap myself awake. (although i do realise that the next exam comes in around another 13 more hours' time).

DAMN IT LA.
NO MOOD. LET ME SCREW UP JUST ONE MORE TIME PLEASE.

haha. you know i'm joking.
do you?

thinking back, i've never ever gone into a math exam not feeling confident. I MUST NOT GIVE UP! (but i think i will).
and here i am, contradicting myself once again when i'm supposed to be studying. YAY!

scribbled. ; 6:57 PM

couldn't get to sleep yesterday. was looking forward to sleeping on the train when i sat beside someone who smelt like gunpowder. I AM SERIOUS. so throughout the whole ride (from braddell to woodlands. JUST IMAGINE), i had to endure with the smell. for those who don't know, my nose is damn sensitive. sulphur dioxide from sec 1 or 2. omg. -.-

yeah. so i was quite sleepy when i reached school today. which explains why i almost walked past farharnah and cow without noticing them. and yesterday night, i had a random thought. i wanted to roll down the stairs and get myself injured so as to not sit for the exam today :x haha. too much exposure to insanity from the cow. i'm becoming more and more random.

and about the GP paper today, they gave us the 2005 paper1 questions. THEY PHOTOCOPIED THE EXACT SAME THING. but i was a little stoned during the paper. didnt know what to write. THEREFORE, i ended up writing rubbish that didn't really make sense. i think, what i wrote has no relation to the question lol.

yeap. sleepy again. havent started studying for econs/chem. only flipped through integration for math. DIE LA. and someone from S53 actually told me that the boderline cases will be retained. don't know whether this is true or not cos the tutors haven't really mentioned this to us before. hmm. oh well.

time to erm. sleep-read. byebye :D

scribbled. ; 1:38 PM

Friday, March 17, 2006

hmm. for the past few days, i have been slacking. yesterday was the most productive day i had! in the morning, i went online and talked to someone. the person immediately tried to shoo me off to study. so sad. but i managed to stay onilne until 6pm? hahahahahahaha.

so, i realised that i had a chemistry mock the next day. attempted to cramp the whole of organic chem into my puny little brain for around 2.5hours. that's all i did. SO PRODUCTIVE. yeah well, i passed the mock! YAY! MY FIRST PASS IN FUCKINGORGANICCHEMISTRY. woohoo.

but then. i forgot everything liao. :) yeah. time to sleep. been feeling kinda groggy these few days. must be too much computer. (but who cares?). byebye.

scribbled. ; 4:14 PM

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

IT DID NOT HAPPEN.
I AM MAKING MYSELF BELIEVE THAT IT DIDN'T.

:O:O:O:O

well, er. for those who are closer to me, try asking. i won't really put it here cos i know that people are watching. hahaha.

anyway, after econs today, a group of us went down to woodlands library to erm "mug". i realised that a lot of phs people love it there. saw quite a few people on my two trips there. hmm.

yeah so, went down to bishan to catch FD3. the movie was kinda gross. YUCKS. and someone tried to prevent me for covering my eyes. sheesh. GROSS. and erm. there was this couple there. hahah :x cow. you should know la hor. don't wanna say it here. don't wanna say what you said to me here. (by doing so, i just saved your reputation).

P.S: i know i don't get scared at horror movies. but erm. those gruesome movies are just not for me. lalala. BYEBYE.

scribbled. ; 7:53 PM

Thursday, March 09, 2006

IJC GOT SMASHED BY RONIN TODAY.

okay. the school didn't really get smashed. everyone was so dead. i wanted to be damn enthu but i felt a bit weird. maybe it was because they did the gig in acoustic. BUT STILL! ronin leh! yeah. bought their album. QUITE NICE :D

local bands reminds me of electrico. then two grace. two grace. zzz. not gonna plan anymore stuff for that class. it's getting stupid. it's always the same old clique, leaving the rest out. no point. maybe this is why i'm starting to be so quiet in the blog. i'm usually one of the more active bloggers/taggers there. maybe.

oh. I PASSED MY FIRST/SECOND ECONS ESSAY TEST! haha. REJOICE!

scribbled. ; 9:37 PM

Tuesday, March 07, 2006

okay. so i'm partially done with my homework. don't wanna do anything liao. cannot think. no brains. somehow, i think the second batch of j1s are quieter. haha. maybe it's because of the orientation that they have. i just have this feeling that the events are more or less last minute.

haha. BUT BUT BUT. there's this really cute person in this batch. lol. cow, you should know who i'm talking about. :D sooooooooooooooooo cute. cow and i were walking all over the parade square (before assembly) and in the canteen (before civics) just to look for this person.

FUNNY. this is gonna turn into some kinda obsession.

anyway, after school and everything, pei san, raiza and i went down to cwp's mac to do tutorials again. i swear i'll write the 'thank you' card for that counter guy soon. :) hmm. i must at least start to read my notes. soon enough.

today's another pau day! byebye! :D

scribbled. ; 10:43 PM

Monday, March 06, 2006

HOOBASTANK: SAME DIRECTION.
Whenever I step outside
somebody claims to see the light
it seems to me that all of us
have lost our patience
cause everyone thinks they're right
and nobody thinks that there just might
be more than one road to our final destination

But I'm not ever gonna know
if i'm right or wrong
cause we're all going in the same direction
and I'm not sure which way to go
because all along
we've been going in the same direction

I'm tired of playing games
of looking for someone else to blame
for all the holes in answers that are clearly showing
for something to fill the space
was all of the time I spent a waste
cause so many choices point the same way I was going

But I'm not ever gonna know
if i'm right or wrong
cause we're all going in the same direction
and I'm not sure which way to go
because all along
we've been going in the same direction
going in the same direction
same direction (same direction)

So why does there only have to be
one correct philosophy
I don't want to go and follow you
just to end up like one of them
and why are you always telling me
what you want me to believe
I'd like to think that I can
go my own way and meet you in the end
go my own way and meet you in the end

I'm not ever gonna know
if i'm right or wrong
cause we're all going in the same direction
and I'm not sure which way to go
because all along
we've been going in the same direction
going in the same direction
going in the same direction
same direction (same direction)

-----------------------------------------------------
old song. i know. haha. kinda reminds me of all the lost souls out there. people who can't seem to find their true self among others. right, aunty? :) was thinking about what i've heard recently when this song started playing. the news came as a shock. guess no one expected it. not even me.

oh well. let's hope these people find themselves. someday, somehow.
haha. and i'm not depressed, okay? :) don't get yourselves worried. one depressing post and i have people asking me whether i'm okay or not. haha. at least this shows that you guys care. probably.

i've been getting straight Fs for all my tests. i guess i have no one else to blame. MUST. RESIST. PRESSURE. FROM. PEOPLE. TOO GREAT! this just goes to show that jac doesn't excel without studying. okay. pass without studying. breaking assumptions! (OH CRAP. third person speech again! haha.).

yeap. time to sleep. (even before doing my tutorials). haha. byebye people.
P.S: THERE'S PE TOMORROW!

scribbled. ; 9:40 PM

Saturday, March 04, 2006

chah says jac should not dkdc anymore. haha. i'm actually back to my normal self la. come to think of it, i started learning how to be zibi at the first quarter of last year. AUNTY ALSO! (i think you should know what i'm referring to). haha.

yeah. i feeling very okay now! my mother says i can go over to australia. :D after my poly. this meanssss that all i have to do now is to get the grades. yay! curtin! fyi, i've been trying to go to curtin even before O levels. and i'm only in a jc now because NYP requires a A level cert with a science subject in it. lalala. so it's jc, nyp then curtin for me!

also, i realised that i've been "cheated" by these educational institutions for 2-3 times haha. but it's okay. it's too late to do anything now anyway.

oh yes. met a number of people at city hall and town. (4 of us went to town after the whole thing). saw shaun (pang), gladys who didn't recognise me, jian ping, etc. can't remember anymore. haha.
ah! i saw andy also! haha. i just found out that he got into NTU's engineering. why is everyone so into physics?!

off to play! :D byebye!

scribbled. ; 11:58 AM

Thursday, March 02, 2006

Happiness depends upon ourselves.

Aristotle.

maybe i should just set aside all my thoughts for a while and just RELAX. i don't know. maybe it's because of the stupid setback i had a while ago that made me feel so urgh. yeah well, my chinese grade did cheer me up a little. knowing that i can kick his ass for looking down on me! the idiot thinks all of us have to retake chinese. sheesh. oh. and it may also be because of all the comments from people that i'm taking real seriously.

i mean, i may not look serious. but yeah. comments from other people really make me reflect on what went right/wrong. oh well. low self-esteem? maybe. too bad no one agrees with me on this. :)

after a couple of rounds of "STUDY NOW. DO YOUR TUTORIALS NOW," i think it's best i start doing my work. a blunder made me worry a while ago. i thought that the common tests are starting next week. luckily, i found out that i saw the notice wrongly; it's after the holidays.

this got me thinking. IF the common tests are really next week, i'm not the slightest bit prepared. then i got damn stressed haha. (ya. jac is very blur.) so, now, everything people do/say or whatever affects me. YAY!

bbfn. math test tomorrow. so much for hard work, yeah? haha.

scribbled. ; 11:05 PM